I Put The Psych In Psycho

stalkTwo things that I’m rather proud of that will automatically make me seem like an insane person.  Well, I am insane, so get over it.

First, I visited the library to utilize their WiFi, like every day.  However, when I visited today, I noticed that my usual spot, a comfy chair next to an electrical outlet, was taken.  In the row of three chairs sat two people and…a bag.  I assumed the bag belonged to the Asian lady sitting next to it, so I asked if it was hers.  She told me it was not and that someone just left it there.  I believed her and walked away to find a different spot.

But I could not shake the feeling that she lied to me.  I’m distrusting to begin with, but people in California really do not know what the truth is, as people here are kinda terrible.  So I kept an eye on her to see if she did anything with the bag, and lo and behold, after no more than five minutes, she moved it to her feet.

Shocked that I had just been lied to by a seemingly sweet looking Asian lady, I immediately approached her and told her that she lied to me.  She acted as though she had said it was indeed her bag, and when I called her out, she scoffed and turned her head away from me.  Being ignored, by the by, is one of my biggest triggers into crazy, and she had no idea who she was messing with.

As it turned out, the library was hosting some sort of Asian cultural event, complete with drum beating and a dancing dragon.  From what I could gather, she was saving the seat for her family to sit next to her.  I would have been perfectly OK with this explanation had she given it, but instead she felt the need to lie.  Not deterred from my anger, I decided I would ruin the show for her.

Standing across the empty space allocated for the dancing dragon, I stood behind the magazine rack and stared at her.  At first she didn’t notice, but most people can sense when  someone is staring at them for an elongated period of time, and she was no exception.  She would avert her eyes, let her husband know I was staring at her intensely.  For over thirty minutes, I did nothing but stare daggers at her while she pretended not to look at me while occasionally turning her eyes to me for a split second to see if I was still staring.  At one point, she literally grabbed her husband and yanked him over, presumably to tell him to do something.

After the show was over, he got up and walked towards the front, presumably to find someone to assist with the issue.  Sensing this, I decided it was time for me to drop the act and attend to my laptop.  But I feel that my point was made, and I made her incredibly uncomfortable during a show she had originally planned to enjoy.  She was probably afraid for her safety, and in reality I never planned on even so much as speaking to her.  Perhaps I’ve taught her a lesson in honesty.

For my second story, I must back up and explain what I decided to do with my job situation.

I decided to work one last weekend and part ways with the convenience store.  My original plan was to attempt a relocation into the actual San Francisco area as opposed to the East Bay, and it would not be beneficial for me to make that long of a drive out to where they were located.  However, they decided to break their promise to me about working weekends as long as I needed and simply cut ties with me at that moment.  In short, it’s probably for the best.  Since I no longer work there, I will write a review on them later.

When I had first decided to put in my notice, my friend Holden, who happens to be a Trump supporter for some reason, was joking around about Ruth Bader Ginsberg passing away.  Now, I find it rather deplorable that he would joke about such an honorable Supreme Court justice passing away, especially given her old age, but he persisted.  So I decided I would get him back and had the perfect plan.

I messaged my ex, Carol, on Messenger and asked if she would play along with my idea.  We would tell him we were getting back together and I would be moving in with her in Tennessee.  She said absolutely, so I messaged Holden and moved forward with my plan.  I don’t think he believed it at first, but eventually he began to believe I was crazy enough to do it.

After I separated from the convenience store, I found a need to discuss my life direction with Holden, since my cousin apparently thinks it’s cool to ignore me all the fucking time and my ex isn’t great at life advice.  But I couldn’t talk to him about it because he would then know I was lying about getting back together with Carol.  So I decided to speed up the process and tell him I was leaving the next day.

Over the last couple of days, I’ve been sending fake location tags on my supposed route to show him where I want him to think I am.  As of now, he believes that I’m currently asleep in Little Rock, Arkansas.  In reality, I’m at the same library I’ve been going to in the East Bay.  I’ll tell him the truth in a few days when Carol and I will have supposedly reconnected.

Now for my real life plans.

I’ve had interviews for the last couple of days.  I believed one of them was promising, as I was asked about returning for a second interview, but have not heard back about it.  I can chalk it up to it having been Friday and now the weekend, but given that they were asking if I could return Monday morning, I’m not holding my breath.

Another interview that I believed I didn’t do well may end up being my best bet for a position.  I have a couple of interviews lined up for Monday and Tuesday, as well.  Hoping for something to open up soon, because my car is in need of repairs.

Finally, I have to include this awesome fucking video I found yesterday.  Spare two minutes and give it a look see.

So this video made me rather nostalgic for the old Mentos commercials I saw as a kid.  As I kept listening to the lyrics, however, I was rather disturbed by the fact that the lyrics made zero sense.  For example:

Fresh goes better with Mentos fresh and full of life

As it turns out, there’s actually a full length song that the Mentos jingle was based from.  I’m unclear as to whether it was written specifically for Mentos or if it was an actual song that was then rehashed into a catchy, yet nonsensical jingle.  The original lyric was:

Fresh goes better, it’s easy when you’re full of life

What they mean by “fresh” could mean a variety of things.  At one point the word “fresh” was slang for something.  Based on my Google search, it meant very good or cool, which doesn’t necessarily make sense given the line, but I suppose it’s from a time before me.  Or perhaps they really are talking about fresh breath.  Either way, “Mentos” is not mentioned one time in the long version of the song.

So what the fuck, Mentos?  Was the long song written for you or did you just use it for your own marketing?  I want some damn answers, because my childhood depends on it.

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